God , should I pretend to be a strong girl ? . should I pretend like everything perfect ?
when should I be free ? when will that time comes ?
· Best girl
first time I entered to my.school , everythings are okay . nothings went wrong . and I met a girl , that I’ve considered her as my.best friend . she is very kind , beauty and of course a smart student . I knew her exactly , what was her attitude when she were with me . I really love her as my sister , I feel , I won’t be able to hate her . whatever happens .
until we joined the selection of a highest class quality , and apparently both of us were entered to there .but , unfortunately we were violate our promise , that we would sit together as chairmate like before . that’s make me sad . step by step she go away from me . whether it happen with me . :(
· Best friend ?
and I found a girl that really match with me . hmm , I thought she could replace her even better !. ya she is a best girl . but , I dunnot know step by step the more close she with me the more I hate her ,oh God ! I wanna crying .
until I got information that she hates me too . and all of the things are GETTING BROKEN . I’m trying to stop it . I remind my.self well , that she is my.best friend . and God still permit. Me to stop it .
# we continued to the next class. approximately around it , she still hates me too ! she talked everythings at behind about me , it looks like all goes wrong ,it makes me broken yeah ! maybe she couldn’t feel what my feeling is right now . it’s a big pain ! especially when she took my best girl or match with ex.
Yeah , they are match ! really :’( , started from it , I feel I’m losing a part of my.life . she took all my.best friends , their attention . even all the person that loves me also trying to hate me . it’s hurt ! really !
In that time , I felt I’m in the corner . none believe in me , and I decide that I should keep this , until all of this will become alright . eventhough sometimes I’m too over , but it’s the sign of my.pain that I’ve been hiding since long-long ago .
Ya , many of my.friends feel pity at her , but they never see my.sadness , how suffer I am ? I should take a care of the one who loves me . take back the dependence from the one who hates me . and all in 1 class , I should .
but , maybe I couldn’t :(
Honestly , both of them are really precious for me . but it has been done . what should I do ?
nothings to be regret actually .
and I still trying to hide my.pain until now , I’ve been hurt ! :’( , cause
you may not feel I’m hurt .
you may not hear my.cries.
but , at least , you’ve given me a precious thing ! that’s PAIN !
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